I’m happiest when…

December 22, 2025 / Cate Tracey / 2 Comments

My insomnia has significantly improved this week and I’m beyond grateful for that! The irony is that I’m up now, just past 1:30am my time, but it’s mainly due to sleeping off a migraine I had yesterday evening. I hope I can get some sleep shortly, but since I’m here, I wanted to write about when I’m the happiest. I saw someone else write about this recently and loved the idea, so I’m jumping in…

I’m happiest when I feel at peace with the past. I’m happiest when Linley is snoring and sandwiched in bed between Alex and me (like right now!) I’m happiest when I have balance in my life. I’m happiest when I have conversations with thought-provoking and creative friends and strangers. I’m happiest when I feel like I truly belong in Alex’s family. I’m happiest when a difficult past memory is nothing more than a moment, not an hour or day or period of sorrow.

I’m happiest when I see Alex and Linley running on the beach together. I’m happiest when I don’t let what happened in my past give me anxiety about the future. I’m happiest when I’m on a roadtrip or on a flight, about to have a new adventure. I’m happiest when that adrenaline rush hits while I’m doing something fun! I’m happiest when I feel a true sense of community in family, work and life. I’m happiest when I can be outside with Alex and Linley. I’m happiest when I’m on or near the water. I’m happiest when the guilt and shame that can consume me sometimes is finally set free.

I’m happiest when I let go of trying to impress other people. I’m happiest when people respect my boundaries, including myself. I’m happiest when I have a good conversation with a friend after a long day. I’m happiest when I can make an impact, even if it’s a small. I’m happiest when a friend and I catch up, especially if time has passed, and we pick up right where we left off. I’m happiest when my inbox is empty. I’m happiest when I’m away from my phone (yes, I see the irony in this…)

And I’d say I’m happiest when I finally stop putting the weight of the world on my shoulders!

I look forward to taking steps to ensure 2026 is a much lighter year. I need to heal.

Photos taken January – November, 2025✨

Piedmont Park Botanical Garden Lights✨

December 17, 2025 / Cate Tracey / Leave a comment

Last Monday, Alex and I went to the Botanical Gardens at Piedmont Park for our third-annual viewing of the holiday lights—and trains! We love going every year and it makes for a great date night of seasonal cocktails, gorgeous lights and admiring how creative the staff is.

As soon as you walk in, you see these beautiful, silver birds that fly amongst the stars. Alex and I always venture to the main restaurant area for some holiday drinks before making our way through the greenhouse, larger garden where you can see the Atlanta skyline, and other tunnels of lights. This year we each got two: both were mezcal drinks, one being hot chocolate! We had to take an obligatory photo under one of my favorite tunnels.

Luckily, I’d just gotten a new phone and it was fun to snap some artsy shots of the trees, and of course my favorite lady of the park…

One of my favorite parts of this annual experience is watching Alex watch the trains (yes, you heard that correctly!) I don’t know how else to explain it, other than it’s cute to see little kids point at and admire the moving trains, and then you see 30-year-old Alex doing the same thing. It’s the best!

Last but certainly not least, we enjoyed the dangling lights that sync up to the annual playlist. This year’s playlist was more classical, but I of course captured Louis Armstrong’s debut.

It’s hard to describe unless you’re there, but this entire immersive experience is one of my favorite ways to celebrate the holidays here in Atlanta. All last week I kept telling Alex, “I had the best time and I’ve been thinking about it all day!”

Until next year!✨

Media taken Monday, December 8, 2025.

Another weekend with Ellie

December 15, 2025 / Cate Tracey / Leave a comment

Ellie is our aunt’s and uncle’s 15-year-old pup, and boy do I absolutely love her! She’s practically nocturnal, gets random zoomies late at night and early in the morning, and she snores so loud all day… but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I love our weekends (aka: “puppy parties”) with her, and we can’t wait to get Thing 1 and Thing 2 reunited on Christmas!

Media taken Thursday, December 11 – Saturday December 13, 2025🎄

Trying to be the best ally I can be 🫶

December 2, 2025 / Cate Tracey / 4 Comments

I once withdrew my candidacy for a dream job. I would’ve been a partnership program manager for a large nonprofit based in DC, but would’ve been a remote employee with quarterly travel to DC and Arlington, VA. I would’ve been shaking hands with some pretty powerful people, helping nonprofits achieve their goals and partnering with them directly.

While doing more research on the organization, two things existed at once: I was both impressed with the causes I would’ve been supporting (accessible education, decreasing homelessness, etc.) AND scared of the ties the organization had to the libertarian/right-of-center political spectrum. Although the organization was clearly anti-Trump, it also appeared anti-inclusive.

I met with the recruiter a few days before my final, four-hour panel interview was scheduled. I had some questions and also was transparent in my political beliefs. I said, “I will never ask this question of you or the panel, but I want you to know where I stand. I’m an independent but am very left-leaning and although I don’t associate myself with the Democratic Party in our nation’s context, I do call myself a social democrat. I just wanted to be upfront about that because I do try to reach across party lines, but am fearful that I won’t be accepted here because my beliefs seem to differ from the majority’s.” I wanted to share this because I am the only person in my immediate family with LGBTQIA+ friends and progressive views, and know how uncomfortable and lonely it is to be the outsider.

She was shocked, but really respected what I shared. I’m sure she and I don’t agree politically, but we had an amazing, civil and even insightful conversation about it all. I respected how she handled my vulnerability and how she never made me feel judged during our conversation. THAT is what disagreements should look like.

HOWEVER, I do know the subtext: it’s likely that even though she was this way with ME, she may not have been this way with the people I support. I support my LGBTQIA+ friends and community so much so that it’s the main reason why I chose to share my political beliefs with this recruiter. I can’t say I’ve walked a day in my friends’ shoes, but I can say that I’ve gone through family estrangement and feeling like I don’t belong in many settings. My friend K is one of my best friends from Michigan, they’ve always included me and was even a friend I could go to when I didn’t have a place to spend during holidays. KP is probably my only true friend from Chicago and was by my side when I was losing my job and going through a really painful divorce. Gainer has been like a sister to me ever since we met each other here in Atlanta, and her girlfriend Nikki has also become this way for me, too. Heck, even one of my friends who I met through this platform has been an inspiration for me during really dark times (you know who you are!)

At a conceptual level, I’ve never understood homophobia or transphobia, but at a personal level, it confuses me even more. My LGBTQIA+ friends have accepted and loved me when others couldn’t, and I will continue to stand with them no matter what—even if that means pulling my hat out of the ring for a “dream job.”

One day I would love to work for a nonprofit that’s more aligned with my beliefs and ALL communities I support. But until then, I’m going to be the best ally I can be. 💛

November 2025 Gratitude🍂

December 1, 2025December 3, 2025 / Cate Tracey / 3 Comments

November seemed a lot calmer than October, but things are changing just as the leaves did.

November was a good month and I’m excited to practice more mindfulness in scheduling, peacefulness and achieving my goals.

Lunch back at one of our favorite places in Hilton Head

Piedmont dog park

Viagra Boys!!!

The best way to wake up

A new routine in La Mezcla class

Exploring Folly Island and Charleston for the first time

Linley had the best time on National Hiking Day!

Being so close to nature

A pup cup from Uncle Jesse

A fun weekend with Linley and the Alex’s

Adopt don’t shop!!! And donate this holiday season!

Lin got another pup cup!

Hiking Stone Mountain again

Lin being cute and sweet as ever

Yet another dog park day!

Second annual November Stone Mountain hike

November 30, 2025 / Cate Tracey / 2 Comments

Last year during Thanksgiving weekend, your favorite Tracey Trio hiked Stone Mountain. We decided to do this again, and plan on going on this family hike each year.

Hearing Lin crunch through the leaves, talking with Alex and feeling the sun and wind on my cheeks always makes for a great afternoon together. Being in nature with my two favorite fellas is the best way to spend an afternoon!

After rounding our favorite trails along the water, we decided to check out the quarry and learn more about the granite that was mined here.

Until next time, Stone Mountain! ✌️

Media taken Friday, November 28, 2025

Others’ words // getting out of my own head

November 25, 2025November 26, 2025 / Cate Tracey / Leave a comment

During my afternoon walk with Alex and Linley, I started talking about the rumination I was having during my morning walk with Linley. I couldn’t stop thinking about some harsh realities with certain friends. I couldn’t stop thinking about the radical acceptance I’ve been working so hard at in therapy. I couldn’t stop thinking about the radical honesty I needed to communicate with my friends, and myself. Boundaries. When to throw in the towel when I recognize patterns in certain people.

The version of me that knows the truth can see that I gave it my all with my brother, my ex, former friends, other family members and people in my life. The version of me that knows the truth knows that no matter what I would’ve done different, I probably still would’ve been lashed out at by certain friends, questioned by others, and judged by many people in my life. No matter what, I couldn’t have changed their views of me or the outcome of our relationship now.

The version of me that struggles with radical acceptance and honesty believes that it’s all my fault. Someone I had set boundaries with lashing out at me is all my fault. My ex leaving me is all my fault. My brother’s and my lack of a relationship is all my fault. My family’s judgment of me is all my fault. My friendships of ten plus years ending is all my fault. My not fitting in at certain workplaces is all my fault. You see the pattern here…

How can I work on coping with the fact that people have hurt me? All I want to do is blame myself. How can I realize that some relationships weren’t meant to last? All I want to do is reach out to Alissa, Danielle, Jaclyn, Dani, Terry, Brandon, Cass… but I know if I did, I would either be treated horribly, gaslighted or completely ignored.

I wish I’d learned how to communicate my feelings more effectively and in a timely manner, instead of telling Danielle “I don’t know what I did but just know I’ll always love you and you have a special place in my heart.” She probably thinks I ghosted her after ten years of friendship; what I really did was shield my pain because she did something that felt really unforgivable to me. But after four or five years of not speaking to her, who felt like a sister to me, does still eat me alive at times. It’s like that with quite a few people in my life, from my past.

But again: it’s “all my fault” and I carry all the weight and responsibility of others. It’s as though them hurting me is something I deserved, something that was my fault in the end.

How can I heal? How can I move on? My OCD and anxiety would love to know.

I want to cry about people from my past, but the tears never come. I feel like I don’t deserve to grieve or cry, because I “threw friends away.” This is true even when I was abandoned, lashed out at, made fun of, disrespected, etc. I want to heal. 🙏

P.S.: I know deep down that I’ve never “thrown anyone away.” In fact, I held onto the pain and hurting for so long, that when I finally did say how I felt, friendships were ruined. But Brandon, a friend of over ten years, said this to me in the last message he’d ever sent me. When I go through a hard time, sometimes that sentence tears at me. ☹️

P.P.S.: I also know deep down that someone who would speak to me like this at all a) didn’t like that I had boundaries and/or said that I needed space while I was going through my divorce and b) doesn’t really know me like I had thought he did. In our last year or so of friendship, I constantly felt like my feelings were minimized and no matter what I said I had to walk on eggshells. So when I’d moved back to Michigan around the time he had also moved back, I couldn’t be around that or hear those things during my divorce finalization. Before that, Brandon had always been such a loving, caring friend, but something had changed when we were both going through our breakups. We couldn’t help each other the way we had before. And I have to accept that.

National Hiking Day: Linley’s special adventure

November 20, 2025 / Cate Tracey / Leave a comment

I’m a few days late here, but I wanted to tell you all about Linley’s unique experience he had on National Hiking Day! I had no idea Monday was coincidentally this national day, but Linley took a hike with a cool group in Atlanta.

We found Two Chicks and a Pack at a local block party earlier this summer (East Atlanta Strut). It was an awesome event with tons of dog-friendly vendors, and they even had an agility course and show for professionals! When Alex and I saw the van, and ultimately Linley smelled his way to their booth, I was super excited to learn all about this group.

Two Chicks was founded by this awesome woman named Laraine and her best friend. Now there’s an entire team of people who transport and hike with dogs. How it was is that you sign up for a certain day and time, they come scoop up your pup, and they take your dog hiking in a pack! It’s that simple. This was a great alternative from doggy day care, as his previous one in Atlanta failed to inform us that kennel cough was going around, and Linley was recovering from that for nearly a month.

Linley did such a great job getting into the van and crate (that part surprised me haha) and was apparently leading the pack! He got to meet so many other people and dogs, and got to hike at Arabia Mountain in Georgia (I’ve lived here two years and I’ve never even been there!) Linley absolutely loves meeting new dogs and people, exploring new places and peeing on all the things, so they knew he was in heaven!

I can’t wait to sign Linley up for another hike in early December!

Photos taken on National Hiking Day, November 17, 2025 at Arabia Mountain, GA.

Charleston & Folly Beach, South Carolina

November 17, 2025 / Cate Tracey / 1 Comment

Linley and I had never been to Charleston until this weekend, and Alex hadn’t visited since he was a kid. We enjoyed Charleston and the surrounding area, and found the cutest AirBnB that made us feel right at home! We arrived on Friday feeling excited to check out the amenities and the neighborhood.

After checking out all the AirBnB and neighborhood had to offer, Linley snuggled up and Alex and I headed out for our food tour. We’d won these tickets at a silent auction at the Georgia Aquarium, and figured we’d take advantage since we were heading to Charleston anyway. The food tour was great, our host and people on the tour were lovely, and the food was absolutely delicious!

After the food tour, we came back, scooped up Lin, and grabbed dinner at an outdoor spot on the water. Although our food and drinks were nowhere near what it was like on the tour, it made us appreciate the food we’d had even more, haha. It was cute to see Lin get all the attention per usual, and he even got a free bandana!

We were hitting a wall because of what felt like our food comas, so we had a night in, enjoyed the hot tub and some wine we’d brought from home, and talked under the stars. Alex and I are usually talking during TV or long drives, so it was peaceful and much-needed to have a conversation with no other distractions (aside from the cute raccoons we saw in the trees!) Linley was outside with us, but had no interest in being near the hot tub (I’m pretty sure he thought it was a stew or witch’s cauldron or something, haha!) We all slept great that night!

Saturday morning, we headed to Folly Island to hit up the dog beach. The sand and sea were beautiful, and it was so much fun to check out a new place together.

Seeing these two walk, run and play on the beach together always makes my day! ^ 🥹

We continued strolling on that side of the beach for a while, because the water was calm, the beach was private and the shells were too good to pass up! Once we could tell Lin was getting tired of chasing after things, we decided to grab coffee and a snack in town, then head to the other side of the beach. On the other side, there was a pier that dogs weren’t allowed on, but at least we could explore underneath it…

The beach was so beautiful that it was hard to leave, but we knew it was time. We were craving brunch outside and found a place that one of my coworkers recommended to me, and it was delicious! Ellis Creek Fish Camp on James Island had the friendliest staff, the best grouper and shrimp and grits, solid Bloody Mary’s and an amazing R&B playlist that made us feel like we were back in Atlanta! 10/10 would recommend. It may not be our Hudson’s spot on Hilton Head Island, but it was a close second…

After brunch, we headed to a local dog park and bar in Charleston. Broken Leash was a ton of fun for all of us, and we always love taking Linley to these sorts of places during our family vacations (we did in Birmingham, Asheville and other places). We chatted with the locals, Linley had a blast playing with the big dogs, and enjoyed the sunshine a little longer.

We swung by one more brewery for a snack and a couple cocktails before heading back to the AirBnB to relax in the afternoon. Linley needed the nap, and Alex and I enjoyed some trash TV local to Charleston. The boys went on a long walk before dinner and then Alex and I headed to a great seafood restaurant just us two. We sat at the oyster counter and enjoyed some incredible soup, shrimp, oysters and fish. I think we were still full from the night before; that’s how good we ate in Charleston!

We were exhausted after dinner and I’d passed out like I normally do during the week at home (I love a 9 or 10pm bedtime haha!) Linley was clearly still tired, too. Until next time, Charleston!

Media taken Friday, November 14 & Saturday, November 15, 2025 in South Carolina.

Tybee Island fun

November 13, 2025 / Cate Tracey / 4 Comments

I hadn’t been to Tybee Island until the first weekend of November, and I already can’t wait to return! Alex, Linley, Courtney, Chris and I rode with Captain Seth on a charter boat through the marsh and sea of Tybee Island. It was nothing what we expected, but it was absolutely beautiful and I couldn’t be happier with the experience.

As mentioned, we first rode through the marsh in our tiny boat. Seth went fast and it was such a rush! The water was only three feet deep, and was a delta where all the rivers fed into the ocean sea. Our boat actually got stuck at one point, but Alex and I knew Seth would get us out of the mess. Afterward, he went faster again and I was smiling from ear to ear! Seth took us to a sand bar that basically felt like a private beach, and we enjoyed some stretching and running around as we watched the sun begin to set and the birds begin to flock.

Although Courtney and Chris were with us this time, and although Alex was there and we’ve been to the beach as a family before, I couldn’t help but think of all the sunrises that Linley and I experienced during our year in Chicago. I took him every single morning, and it honestly saved my life. I didn’t have many friends there, I’d lost my job and was going through a divorce at the same time. Our sunrises together taught me that I could start anew, and Linley had been my loyal sidekick through all of it. It’s always hard to look back on the past without dwelling on it, and it makes me appreciate the moments we have together now more than ever.

After our fun on the sandbar/private beach, just when I thought our experience couldn’t get any better, it did. We were going fast in the ocean when Seth decided to stop suddenly. As we came to a stop, we saw a family of dolphins approach our boat! I’ve never seen dolphins before and I couldn’t believe my eyes; I started tearing up, Alex started filming and Linley was whining away haha. It was truly a once in a lifetime experience and it took my breath away.

Being with my two favorite fellas, two of my close friends and someone who led us to that moment was truly an unforgettable experience. We watched the moon and rode fast again once the dolphins let us be.

The last part of our ride back to the dock was equally as breathtaking as I saw the most beautiful sunset, which reminded me of a safari. I’ve seen sunsets in a few different countries and continents, but there was something really special about this one.

I didn’t get a horizontal picture of the sunset or photos of the constellations in the sky at night, but I’ll never forget any of it.

Until next time. 🫶

Media taken Saturday, November 1 on Tybee Island, Georgia. 🌅

Insomnia

November 13, 2025November 14, 2025 / Cate Tracey / Leave a comment

I lay in bed with Alex and Linley lightly snoring next to me, feeling calm in their presence now but waking up from a panic. I’m panicking about trying to find ESL students and coaching clients, too. I’m panicking about not being able to “do all the things” or “getting it all done” before the end of the day/week/month/year. You know, the typical anxiety stuff 😅

Kidding aside, I’ve really been trying to write more rather than simply post more. I’m personally not a fan of Taylor Swift’s music, but I do find it fascinating that even when she’s not going through a breakup, she still remains super popular. As I’ve been adding to my blog and redoing my website, I’ve realized some of my most popular posts were from my darkest days. I hope that sharing my anxiety around career stuff doesn’t necessarily make me more “popular,” but I do hope people read this and think, “Oh, she’s in a great marriage now and Linley’s still doing great, but she’s real like me, too.” Yes, I’m in a much better place now and that depression I felt a few years back is no more; but sometimes my anxiety and OCD can feel daunting at times (and unfortunately, that time is usually 3 or 4 a.m.!)

In the meantime, I’m going to try to get some sleep, realize that I’m doing the best I can, and lay with Linley and Alex by my side (in that order haha 😉)

Hilton Head encore une fois !

November 12, 2025 / Cate Tracey / Leave a comment

Once again, we were in Hilton Head Island on November first. It’s hard to believe almost two weeks have flown by since our third annual visit there as the Tracey Trio…

This place is incredibly special because this was Alex’s first beach experience with Linley in 2023, and where I proposed in 2024. This is exactly what I live for, and what life should be more about. It was special to share with our friends this time around, to see Lin run after his new favorite toy, and to eat at one of our favorite restaurants again.

Until next time, Hilton Head Island! 🥹🤗