My happiest holiday

/ Cate Tracey

To feel a true sense of belonging and welcoming from Alex and his family means more than I can’t put into words.

When I was living in the Midwest, I had to scramble to find alternate holiday plans. I don’t mean to be a Grinch with what I share below, but I do want to set the tone for how past holidays with my immediate family would go: There was absolutely no way that I would spend a day of gratitude and love with my brother and his wife who I’m estranged from, or parents who will never love me the way they love my brother, or family members who judged me for being with men who weren’t white, for my tattoos or for my willingness to go to therapy to break our toxic family cycles of generational trauma. Short story long: I always spent time with friends and their families to avoid what I would deem as nothing short of toxic.

The only cousin I’m close to and her fiancé Ben visited us a couple weekends ago, and it was a great way to kick off the holidays! We played games until midnight and had fun at some of our favorite local restaurants. I love Katy more than she’ll ever know. 💛

Last month, I made a new friend while taking Linley to the dog park on one of my days off. Ariel and I went on our first “friend date” of many, and even Alex loved how close we became! It was definitely fate. ✨

Alex’s and my first Christmas together was nothing short of amazing. And it’ll be the first of many. 🥰 Linley and I had so much fun with his family relaxing in the morning, eating great food throughout the day and enjoying some espresso martinis along the way. Alex and his family welcomed us and have made us feel a sense of belonging since the moment we moved down to Georgia in September. We couldn’t feel more lucky. 🥹

And just because I’m feeling this grateful and loved, here are some other fun December photos we took this month:

✨Photos taken December 2023, Atlanta, GA✨

10 thoughts on “My happiest holiday”

  1. Cate, I just read your latest blog post, and I have so much to say! First off, you look genuinely happy in those pictures, and it’s so refreshing to see that joy. I completely understand the family struggles you’re going through. My family never approved of me being a lesbian. When I announced on Facebook that I planned to marry my wife, Amelia, they told me I had to choose between them or getting married. It was heartbreaking, but I chose Amelia. Since then, my family hasn’t spoken to me. And I have since closed my Facebook account.

    This Christmas, Amelia and I spent our time together at our farm, just the two of us, as both our families have cut us out. It’s tough, but I believe that you should be with who makes you happy, regardless of others’ opinions. It sounds like your family is being completely unreasonable regarding your relationship choices. Just know, Amelia and I accept everyone for who they are and love them all the same.

    On a brighter note, I’m happy to report that I am finally making friends here in Vermont. They’re all LGBTQ+, and that’s totally fine with me and my wife. We’ve found a community that accepts us for who we are, and it’s been incredibly healing.

    Please keep sharing your stories, Cate. Your posts give me and so many others so much comfort and a sense of belonging. As always, please keep in touch! 🙂

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    • Thomas, thank you so much for reading and for your encouragement as always. YOUR life stories and experiences give others a sense of belonging — especially me! You’ve inspired me so much in many ways, and I can’t thank you enough for that. I’m very happy to hear that you and Amelia had a lovely Christmas on the farm, and that you’ve making new friends in Vermont and are feeling that sense of community you both deserve.

      Family is extremely complicated, especially when you’re “wrong” in someone’s eyes. You chose right by choosing Amelia; she’s your love and new family, and as hard as that must’ve been, you made the right decision. I love that you two accept and love everyone as they are, because I certainly try to do the same (even when it feels challenging at times; family is a good example!)

      Thank YOU for sharing your stories and I look forward to many more conversations this year and next! When I’m in the area I’ll definitely let you know, since we plan on being in upstate New York and other parts of the East coast this summer! 💛🤗

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