My insomnia has significantly improved this week and I’m beyond grateful for that! The irony is that I’m up now, just past 1:30am my time, but it’s mainly due to sleeping off a migraine I had yesterday evening. I hope I can get some sleep shortly, but since I’m here, I wanted to write about when I’m the happiest. I saw someone else write about this recently and loved the idea, so I’m jumping in…
I’m happiest when I feel at peace with the past. I’m happiest when Linley is snoring and sandwiched in bed between Alex and me (like right now!) I’m happiest when I have balance in my life. I’m happiest when I have conversations with thought-provoking and creative friends and strangers. I’m happiest when I feel like I truly belong in Alex’s family. I’m happiest when a difficult past memory is nothing more than a moment, not an hour or day or period of sorrow.
I’m happiest when I see Alex and Linley running on the beach together. I’m happiest when I don’t let what happened in my past give me anxiety about the future. I’m happiest when I’m on a roadtrip or on a flight, about to have a new adventure. I’m happiest when that adrenaline rush hits while I’m doing something fun! I’m happiest when I feel a true sense of community in family, work and life. I’m happiest when I can be outside with Alex and Linley. I’m happiest when I’m on or near the water. I’m happiest when the guilt and shame that can consume me sometimes is finally set free.
I’m happiest when I let go of trying to impress other people. I’m happiest when people respect my boundaries, including myself. I’m happiest when I have a good conversation with a friend after a long day. I’m happiest when I can make an impact, even if it’s a small. I’m happiest when a friend and I catch up, especially if time has passed, and we pick up right where we left off. I’m happiest when my inbox is empty. I’m happiest when I’m away from my phone (yes, I see the irony in this…)
And I’d say I’m happiest when I finally stop putting the weight of the world on my shoulders!
I look forward to taking steps to ensure 2026 is a much lighter year. I need to heal.
Photos taken January – November, 2025✨
Traveling with the Traceys 
This year, I did not take nearly as many photographs as I thought I would—or promised myself I would. I kept thinking I would come back to it later, when things steadied, when my hands felt like mine again. It was a brutal year, one that now sits beside 1998, which until 2025 stood alone as the worst year of my life. Some memories do not need to be documented. Some are better softened through the lens of nostalgia—the only filter that sometimes takes the edge off an irreplaceable loss. This year, I lost my mother, the last member of my family, and I lost a few people I once called friends. I have tried to do the right thing, to do good by people, even when everything felt uncertain, but a by late December, it only gives you so much time. Whatever healing remains will have to wait for 2026.
I have read and enjoyed your blog for years because you have always come across as genuinely open minded, grounded, and interesting. I only describe a very select few people in my life this way (I married the other one). Thank you for always being one of my friends who always understands, accepts, and is amused by differences in perspective. 🙂
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Keep smiling! Good wishes.
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